Four years on, the plastics begin

Today is what I like to call my rebirth-day, or, as it's known in the weight-loss surgery community, my "surgiversary." Four years ago today, I had RNY gastric bypass surgery and my life has never been the same. I won't bore you with all the details of how much better I feel now, how I can do things I never thought possible. It's all true, but I would just be repeating myself! It never gets old, though, this thing called LIFE. It's more than I ever thought it could be. To date, I have had ZERO complications, only freedom...from pain, illness and the bonds of my own body. And I wouldn't change a thing except that I wasted so much time.

A before and after (click to enlarge):


For those who are interested - you can go back and check out where my brain was 4 years ago here and here.

In my last entry, I mentioned that I got my tummy tuck surgery date (August 12) and I had an appointment to see my plastic surgeon (PS) on July 4th. That appointment got moved to July 11, so I'll likely do another update afterwards.

I heard about this surgeon from my bariatric support group. A lot of fellow patients have been to him - indeed, his assistant said about 85% of his patients are of the bariatric variety. I like him very much but his assistant...lorda mercy. Honestly, speaking to her is a chore. And even sitting in the waiting room, listening to her talk to other patients, tries MY patience. I don't tolerate stupidity and rudeness very well. I think I've mentioned this before - she needs another profession.

The whole plastics experience has been a whirlwind since April, my first visit to his office. At that time, I was given a quote for his services, far above what I knew some of my friends to have paid. This was surprising, but prices go up so...whatever. I soon got approval from OHIP for my panniculectomy and we went from there. The coverage for the panniculectomy is minimal; I still have to pay thousands of dollars for the "upgrade" to a full tummy tuck (tightening and repair of the abdominal muscles and removal of more tissue and skin). I went back to see him last month and was informed the procedure had gone up another $1,000. Not only that, this new quote was only good for 6 weeks. If I didn't pay this new, inflated price right away, the price could go up again....and again... I had no idea when the surgery would be, so I had two choices: Pay right now or wait and take my chances the price could go up thousands of dollars by the time I got a surgery date. Oh...and we had to pay in full two months before the surgery date...whenever that would be.

I burst into tears in the parking garage. Erich and I had been putting money aside for this, but $1,000 was a lot of money. Plus, I had tremendous feelings of guilt. There was so much more we could do with this money. Many other things needed our attention and I felt bad enough about spending thousands of dollars on a tummy tuck. Yes, I needed it, for medical, cosmetic and mostly psychological reasons. But still. If I hadn't allowed myself to reach nearly 500 pounds in the first place, none of this would be necessary. I feel a LOT of self-loathing and guilt about that.

My husband would hear none of this. "I'll handle it," is all he kept telling me as I cried and battled a near-nonstop headache for the rest of the week. My first thought was to sell the Camaro he bought for me when I lost half my body weight. He said "NO. Absolutely not." Alrighty then! He was adamant that I have the surgery ASAP and he would find a way to pay for it.

The surgery costs $5500 (starting out at $4500 and going up $1000). And we didn't have it all. Not yet.

You might ask me why I didn't try another surgeon. Well, this PS is very well known in the weight-loss community as being extremely affordable and willing to work with OHIP coverage. I had a nightmare experience with a PS a couple years ago that I detailed here. That PS wanted more than twice this amount to do the same surgery. I'd also heard price horror stories about other surgeons. So while we were presently scraping together cash, it wouldn't be as much as other prices I'd heard about.

I'd told the PS assistant to look to October when she asked me when I wanted to have the surgery. She also asked me how much notice I'd need for a date. I told her two weeks. I have a fairly new job and wanted to give my employer some notice. I knew we still needed to scrape together the money but I was really worried and upset. To keep the cost down, we would need to pay in full by July 30 or, like I said, risk the ever-escalating price. I compared it to a kitten chasing a ball of yarn the just kept unraveling and the kitten never catching up. If we didn't pay soon, we'd just keep chasing the higher price.

Soon, she called and asked me if August 12 would be acceptable. I was floored, flabbergasted. I'd originally thought this wouldn't happen until after the new year. Of course, this new date would mean we'd need to pay NOW. In fact, she wanted me to courier a check that same day! Um, no. No can do. This was on a Friday afternoon; Monday was Canada Day. I told her we would have to make arrangements to get the money together and send it to her on Tuesday. She was pretty upset by this and put me on hold (needs a new job). But when she came back on, she agreed.

Again, I was very upset about the money aspect. Erich again told me, "I'll have it by Tuesday. Don't worry." He doesn't like to discuss things with me because he just wants to take care of it, but it sometimes just makes me worry even more. In his mind, keeping the details from me protects me. Sometimes that's true, but in this instance it just made me crazy. LOL! Eventually, we got the money together and sent it in via Purolator. It made me physically ill. Excited, nervous, guilty, scared, you name it.

So it's done. Paid for in full and scheduled. During my last appointment, I asked the PS how much skin and tissue he thought he would be taking off. The PS in London told me maybe 3-5 pounds. That seemed an impossibly low number and made me even more dubious of her at the time. Well, the new PS said "At least 6 kilos...about 14 pounds." I literally could not speak. While I knew I had a lot of excess skin to get rid of, I didn't think it was that much. Maybe he's over-estimating. I'm trying not to get my hopes up, I really am. He also assured me this surgery will be "life-changing"....again? *deep breath* Ok. Strapping in for another life change. Erich jokes that this will be his 4th wife: He was married before me then to the pre-op me, the post-op me, and now the tummy tuck me. LOL!

I've had this stomach for so long, I don't know what it's like to be normal. Ever since I can remember, I've shopped for shirts long enough to cover it and loose enough to hide it. Ever since I can remember, I've had to lift it up in the shower and wear baby powder to help keep the rashes at bay. It's actually worse since I've lost weight and it's like an empty bag. I've taken to wearing a "looser, everyday" Spanx just to keep it from moving around and causing chafing. But even "super-Spanx" doesn't make it disappear. I know I'll never feel truly successful until I get it off me. And I can't wait to see how this affects me, both physically and emotionally.