Santa-time snacking

How is everyone doing with the holiday-eating thing? Me, it's going ok. I'm striving for balance and it seems to be working thus far.

At this point, at 17 months post-op, I can eat almost anything. I'm lucky in that I haven't had any real serious issues with food consumption since my surgery. There were things that bothered my pouch in the beginning – bread, poultry, sugar – but now I'm in pretty good shape. The 'normal-ness' returned slowly but surely and now I can and do eat just about anything I want. Smoked sausage still bothers me, as does rice. I can have a tiny bit of rice but then my pouch says 'whoa!' You know the thing of not throwing rice at weddings now because the birds eat it and it swells their stomachs? Yeah. That's what happens to me. No idea why the smoked sausage is a problem. Sugar is ok now in small quantities but I still need to take it easy on an empty stomach. I found that out the hard way; I still never have had a dumping episode, though. I'm very proud of that!

I'm upping the exercise intensity at the gym, doing up to a 15 incline on the treadmill and pushing myself to go farther, faster. It’s a trade off, right? If you’re going to indulge a bit then you have to work it off.

Especially now with Christmas approaching, there is ample opportunity to go completely off the rails. I don't have to tell you it's not always easy to stay on track. There will always be a part of me, inside, that desperately wants to eat, eat, eat. I call her Zelda. Why? I dunno, I just do. Zelda usually comes out to play when I'm bored or tired. She wants snacks. Snacking is a big thing with me – I'd rather snack all day and night than eat meals. I'm also a person who would rather have 10 little things with $100 than one quality item. I want variety! I sometimes have trouble making up my mind, I guess. Zelda likes fries and Tim Hortons Timbits. Now some of that is ok. I truly believe you never have to give up all things that are “bad” for you. But sometimes Zelda has to be squashed or I'd end up right back where I started.

I think about food a lot. That's the thing, right? If you want to eat well, you kinda have to put a lot of thought into what you're eating which can be a problem. If you have an addiction to something, it’s tough to have to constantly think about it. Sometimes the healthy eating is automatic but most of the time, it's a CHOICE and something that I have to be conscious of doing. My hope is that one day it will be automatic. I'm still in the learning stages of this stuff and I don't mind telling you it's a struggle sometimes. I swear it'd be easier to quit crack. At least you don't have to weigh and measure your acceptable daily crack dose and have the strength to turn away another hit. You just stop smoking crack. Period.

I have the energy to cook and bake now and I'll be damned if I wasn't going to do it just because it'd be a sin to have treats in the house. I made them. They're here. And I do eat them sometimes. Like I said – up the workout, shoot for better eating at mealtime. So far it hasn't shown up on the scale too much at all so I must be doing something right. Water is so important, too. Drink, drink, drink.

Some of you may remember that I put my wedding set away almost a year and a half ago when it nearly fell off my finger while I was swimming laps in the pool. Well, since I reached my goal, I recently got them re-sized and can you believe I have size 6 fingers? I sure as hell can't! I was probably 6 years old the last time I had size 6 fingers. When Erich bought my engagement ring in 2001, he simply tried it on himself to see whether or not I could wear it. It was a size 11. How does a person lose 5 sizes in their damn FINGERS? It blew me away.

Another funny story: I wanted to wear a nice watch to Erich's company Christmas party. My regular Italian-charm Bo Bice watch didn't seem quite right. LOL! So I dug around in my jewelry box and I don't have a single watch that I can wear. Nada. I spent so much time searching and so much money paying extra for bigger things and now I have no use for them. It makes me kinda sad in a way. All this stuff that I can't wear anymore. All my rings, bracelets, watches - even my necklaces are too long. So I bought a cute watch from Avon thinking I could wear it. Uh, wrong. Even it was too big! So I have to take it to a jewelry store and get links taken out. Gah. Nice thing to complain about, I suppose!

I wore a dress for the party. Yes, Cindy put on a dress. I do not do dresses. Erich said “Oh! I see a little leg!” LMAO!! Plus I wore the hooker boots he bought me that I can actually walk in now. We clean up pretty well, although that dress didn't look the way I thought it would on me for some reason. I did try it on, but I dunno. I was a little disappointed. Here's a pic:



I have an appointment on the 18th to get my goal tattoo. It took me a while to make up my mind about exactly what I wanted. It will be a heart like the others, but with butterfly wings. I think it'll turn out great.

One last thing: I am freezing to death. Seriously. Layers, fireplace on, dryer running – I’m comfortable now. Erich will come home and feel like he’s in a sauna.