Anticipation is makin' me late

I've been impatient all my life. It's just another one of my many flaws, I suppose! I don't like waiting for anything. I used to hate waiting in line, but I think that had more to do with not being able to physically stand there than anything else. Still...I'm not one for waiting.

So this last 15 pounds or so is driving me nuts with the way it's coming off so slowly! Seriously. I know so-called 'normal, healthy weight loss' is supposed to be one to two pounds a week. But it's killing me. Now I'm not perfect. I eat some things I probably shouldn't and have been known to skip the gym occasionally. If I went all Navy Seal on my body, I could lose it faster. I'm trying to settle into a manageable, lifelong routine of eating and moving - something I can live with forever. I understand that means the weight loss will slow down. That doesn't mean I like it! LOL!

I've had a lot of stress in my life this past week so the Food Brat part of my personality emerged somewhat. Man, sometimes your kids just kill your soul, you know? The disappointment is physically hurtful. Nothing you can do about it. I feel worse for Erich than myself but it is what it is.

I have particular trouble with late-night snacking. I think it's boredom compounded with stress. I need to find other outlets for that time period around 10 p.m. where I think 'Ho-hum, guess I'll have a handful of peanuts' and I'm not even hungry. Now I've said before that I don't believe in cut-off times for eating. If it's 11 p.m. and I'm hungry, I will eat something. The clock doesn't rule my life. But I gotta get rid of the Food Brat. However, when I do snack, I try to make good choices so that's probably what's saving my ass from gaining.

I've lost two pounds this week. On Friday, I was down one and this morning I weighed myself again (I always do before I blog) and was down one more. So I weigh 209 now, 13 pounds to goal. It's so close I can taste it. And I do not want to wait another 13 freakin' weeks to get there. Impatience.

But here's the really weird part. It doesn't seem to matter what I do. I can have a Food Brat week and lose two or three pounds. Then I can be very vigilant about my diet and workouts and lose one. It's really enough to drive a person nuts. My surgeon, Dr. Genaw, told me when I last saw him that varying your caloric intake is good for your metabolism. So maybe - every now and then - having something to eat out of the norm is good for you. Do not go all KFC or Pizza Hut on your diet, but small changes. When I told him my intake varied from 1100-1400 a day, he said that was good as long as I watched that 1400 number, didn't go much higher than that and only occasionally. And I know my trainer told me not to do the same workouts all the time because your body gets used to it and will not respond after a while. I know from experience that is true. I need to switch things up to keep my body guessing.

I have to watch my impatience because that in and of itself can cause stress which brings out the Food Brat and the wheels on the bus go round and round. This week my goal is to find ways to beat back the brat by combating boredom and stress. Wish me luck.