The gym

I guess those gym-Barbies scared me more than I realized! LOL!

So I go to the gym Friday night for my first session with Jennifer. I thought I was fine till I walked in. I dunno, just walking past all the equipment and all the ladies on said equipment, I had to take a deep breath to calm myself. I suppose it was a fear of the unknown combined with white-hot intimidation.

I arrive early and Jennifer's running late. So after I 'put away anything I didn't need' - this was the direction of the girl at the front desk...not realizing I had absolutely NO earthly idea what I would actually need - I sat in the waiting area till Jennifer was ready.

She was very nice, asked me a few questions then told me we had to go back and take my blood pressure.

Uh oh.

I know me, and I know my blood pressure. When I get nervous or upset, it shoots up like a 747 (like Wednesday in Detroit). No surprise, it was pretty high. So she told me we couldn't do anything unless the top number was under 140. I tell her "Well, as terrified as I am right now, I'm not surprised at those numbers." She thought that was pretty funny and tried to calm me down. We tried again. Much lower, but still too high. Then she tells me anything higher than 140 and they need a note from my doctor. Oh the irony!! My blood pressure is finally low enough that my dr. has decided I don't need medication anymore. I go to the gym to get even healthier, and am so nervous that now I have to go BACK to the dr. and get permission to work out. Good grief.

She says we'll try one more time. "How do you feel?" she asked. "Any calmer?" Uh, well, no, not since you've now told me I'll need to make a dr. appt. (it'll take 2 weeks to get in); take a half day off work to go to the dr. (cuz she won't do this over the phone...she doesn't get paid that way; and she's always about 2 hours behind in her appointments) and get a note. Plus, my dr. will charge me personally (not just the government) for the privilege of writing the note. Not making me calm. No. We try again and it's even higher than the first reading.

So...we're done for the day. Didn't hit the first lick. But get this: I can work out at the gym on my own but not with her. To sum up, the unhealthy people who might have high blood pressure (I'm not one of them, mind you) are not allowed to have supervision. Ohhhh, that makes a lot of sense! LOL!

*heavy sigh* She suggested I walk on the treadmill Sat. & Sun. to try and get more comfortable in the gym, the atmosphere. Ok, sure. She stuck around and got me started because I'd never been on a treadmill in my life and didn't want to go flying off the thing through the back wall or something. As I said, she was really nice.

The treadmill is weird! When I get off the thing, my legs are like Jell-O - all tingly like they've been asleep. And I still feel like I want to walk, even when I get off it. Makes me a bit dizzy, too. I can go a little over a mile, though, in 30 mins. It was fine - it felt good. I did it last night, I did it today and I'll do it tomorrow.

I checked my b.p. before I left for the gym today. Perfect. I checked it when I got there - way too high. This is ridiculous. And it's all my head! I know that, intellectually. All intimidation is psychological. It's a hurdle I must get over or it's going to stall my weight loss. And THAT, dear readers, pisses me off. I hate to think anything or anyone intimidates me. I will overcome this.

We'll see what happens tomorrow but as it looks now, I'll be calling my dr. on Monday morning. I know she'll write the note, but damn it all to hell. *grumble grumble*