I was in a pretty bad state of mind when I wrote my last post (duh). But this past week, I decided to take at least one step in the right direction and get things back on track.
A few times a year since my surgery, I do something called the 5 Day Pouch Test (5DPT). It's always helped me get back on track both physically and mentally. And I do notice that, of course, when things go off the rails in my brain, my diet goes off track. I can eat pretty much whatever I want at this point in my journey and that's dangerous. Since I'm so far out post-op, it's even more important to get control of my eating habits before the unthinkable happens and I get some serious re-gain. Of course, there are things I avoid simply because I guess they'll always be harder for me to digest (chicken breast, rice, sugary drinks, regular white bread, and others) but I definitely have to make smart choices just like those who haven't had surgery. The pouch is a tool to be used wisely for the rest of my life. I can screw it up and gain everything back *that just gave me a shiver* Every person who has surgery is different but this is how it is for me.
In the past, I've beaten myself up for not making smart choices 100% of the time. You know - one of those people who is like "WHOO-HOO!! No more bread, EVER! No more sugar, EVER!! I will never eat another french fry or slice of pizza again...EVER!! Zumba twice a day!! Whoo-hoo!! Forever!!" with no deviation. I know people like that - or at least, that's how they present themselves - and bless their hearts but I'm just not that girl! It used to really bother me that I couldn't seem to be like them but I've come to accept my humanity couple of years. In order to be successful - for me - I have to give myself some leeway to eat like a normal person and not Jillian Michaels (blech) sometimes. If I constantly beat myself up over it, I'll just feel badly and...eat more crap. So no. Over, done with, gone.
Even so...some people need refresher courses once in a while. That's how I see the 5DPT. The plan is controversial in some weight loss-surgery circles. If you mention it on certain message boards or in certain groups, you will get POUNDED. Whatever. It works for me when I do it and I'll just continue doing what works for me, thanks. This is why I don't belong to many groups or any message boards. It doesn't matter what you're doing, someone will tell you you're wrong. Really wrong! And you're gonna die! LOL! I don't need it in my life.
5DPT is just getting back to basics, in my opinion. Protein, protein, protein. It does eliminate all carbs and I confess that I do not do that. I follow the plan and make the recipes, but I add fruit. Apples, grapes, a banana...some fruit every day just like always. And I eat a protein bar every day...just like I always do. Lots of water and recipes that go with the plan on the corresponding days. The key word here is "plan". You have to make a plan to follow this plan. This is important. We all need to figure out what we're going to eat before we get hungry and start rummaging through the fridge like a starved maniac. That is a habit that needs to be kept long after the 5 days are over.
This past week while on the plan, I lost 9 pounds. Yes. Nine pounds in 5 days. That's kind of unusual in that I average 5-7 when I've followed it in the past. That tells me I was holding onto a lot of crap inside my body that needed to be shed. I was also holding onto a lot of crap in my brain. Taking control of my eating habits has helped my outlook tremendously.
I decided to keep a Right Journal. I made two columns and kept an ongoing list every day of the things I did right on one side and things I needed to work on in the other. "Work on" - not wrong. Positivity was important to me this week and I really tried to focus on that. It worked well and let me go back and see that I do a lot more right than not. I know how to do this thing called life. It's a pretty incredible one that I've created for myself. And I need to remember to treat myself well - which goes right along with making smarter choices for my body. It'll do my mind a world of good.
So I lost 9 pounds but re-gained a new, positive outlook. The best kind of re-gain! I'm determined to make more changes in my life and continue on this path. We only get one chance, right?
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I could tell that you were not in a good place with your last post. Sounds like you're back on track and so much more positive and upbeat. I'd say that it's a much nicer way to treat your self...you deserve better than your last post. :)
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