Online forums: *shrug*

In the interest of full disclosure, I'm a big believer in the Internet. My presence is very visible in this blog, on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn - not much into Pinterest as of yet. I need some form of 3D life. And of course, as I've spoken of many times, my immersion in Bo Bice's fan club/community has been life altering. Used correctly and responsibly, online communities bring like-minded people together and make them feel supported and understood. My wide circle of friends and family are all over the globe and I'm so grateful to social media for helping me stay in touch at the click of a mouse.

So it may seem odd that I am a late bloomer when it comes to online support systems meant for bariatric patients.

Henry Ford Hospital gives each of their bariatric patients a Big Blue Binder full of answers to just about any question you could think of and I studied it carefully. Maybe I felt that was enough? I joined a Yahoo group for Henry Ford patients but wasn't a huge presence there. Through it, I learned of an in-person support group nearby and went to one meeting a few weeks after my surgery in July, 2009. There were two other people and it was kind of...empty and strange. While one person present educated me about an online message board called Obesity Help (OH) and pointed me in the direction of a fantastic blog called The World According to Eggface, I didn't go back.

I created an account at OH but again...didn't post much. I can't remember if I ever posted at all. There was some support there and good information, but everyone seemed to already know each other and I didn't know where to start. There also seemed to be a fair amount of cattiness, judgment, cliques and "inside jokes" (which I hate). So I just concentrated on this blog and my Big Blue Binder.

Through Facebook, I found Melting Mama and her Bariatric Bad Girls Club (BBGC). Or rather, she found me (thanks, Beth) when she requested my friendship after reading my brusque (hey, I gotta be me) response to a post from a so-called "leader" in the bariatric community. That person is now finished and most of us couldn't be happier. Through BBGC, I found the Community of Bariatric Patients of Southern Ontario and the Cambridge Coffee Crew (CCC...are you keeping up with the acronyms?), the wonderful bunch of women I am proud to call my sisters following this twisted path of health. I went to my first meeting in June of last year, a week before my 3rd "surgiversary" or what I like to call my Rebirth-day.

I was surprised to find people at CCC and BBGC who were months pre-op. Some haven't even got their surgery date scheduled yet. Looking back, I wonder how different my journey would've been if I'd had this support system. Luckily, success came to me despite it. My cheerleaders have been all of you, as well as a wonderful system of family and friends. But it's true I had no one who had actually gone through this and knew what I was thinking and feeling. Support is so very important and you can never have too much.

So I am envious of these people in some ways. Not so much in others. I still don't participate/post much in online forums because I still find so much judgement there. You know what they say about opinions, right? It doesn't matter what you're doing, someone will tell you it's wrong or you're not doing it as well as they are. Most of the time it's in a passive-aggressive way, sometimes it shows outright hostility. Then someone chimes in with what should be the Bariatric Life Principal, "we are all different", trying to calm things down. I dunno, it's tiring to me and I don't have time for the drama. If someone wants to eat a certain thing or take a certain brand of vitamins, don't judge. You know what The Beatles say - let it be. Words of wisdom and all...

Bullshit is everywhere and I suppose it's our job to duck and cover when we deem it necessary. Some people love OH and the online bariatric community, and that's great. Whatever works for them. I'm pretty sensitive so maybe it's just me. But I will stick with my CCC girls - even though no group is perfect - and this blog, all of you. Add CCC, my amazing husband and the Big Blue Binder to the mix and I think this is going to be a very good year for success!

The big week!

First off, be sure to tune in to the premiere episode of The Ricki Lake Show tomorrow, Monday, September 10, to check out the segment featuring Michelle Vicari - better known as the brains behind The World According to Eggface. I've featured her link on my blog since the beginning. She has helped so many people with her fabulous (!!) recipes and support. Now it's time to support her - and ALL of us!. First Beth on Nightline and now this. Good stuff.

Pretty big week coming up! Three concerts lined up. Madonna at the Air Canada Centre in Toronto on Wednesday; Loretta Lynn here in Kitchener at Centre in the Square on Thursday; then a quick overnighter to Flat Rock, Michigan with a few friends to see Bo (as in Bice. Are you paying attention?). Erich isn't going with me this time because I need to do this as cheaply as possible. He understands Bo is good for my soul and it will do me a world of good to see him and all my friends. I've seen Madonna once before but hey...it's Madonna! Very psyched about that! I grew up listening to Loretta Lynn. My mother's family is from southern Kentucky and I feel a certain kinship with her. I've lost count of the times I've seen "Coal Miner's Daughter". Her people are like my people. Seeing her is a bucket-list thing. Can't wait.

"Sons of Anarchy" season premier Tuesday. What, you don't watch that? Are you crazy? Here's a good reason why you should start. Happy viewing (click to enlarge):


Yesterday, as part of my 10K training, I did a dry run of the "race". Lately, I've been walking a lot outside because - one - I'd probably slit my wrists if I had to do more than a 5K on a treadmill and - two - the event will be outside so it's best to get acclimated to that environment. Twice I forgot to put on sunscreen and came home pretty tomato-y. I am a very white Irish girl and will redden after about 15 minutes in direct sunlight. Maybe I'm also a vampire. Who Knows What, right?

Anyway...no sunscreen needed yesterday! It was very dark and gloomy. And COLD! Windy! That sort of weather aggravates my knee arthritis and makes my head pound with sinus pressure. Did you hear that whining? Yeah, that was me. I loaded up on some drugs, put on a hooded windbreaker and went on my way. I did get rained on but it was all good. About 3/4 the way through it, the sun came out and it warmed up. And I did something new that I forgot I was able to.

I took off my jacket and tied the arms around my waist so I wouldn't have to carry it.

Now, if you've never been obese, you are probably thinking "So what?" Well, that's something morbidly obese people don't do. Because they can't. Personally, I haven't been able to do that since...elementary school, maybe? I don't know. I just know that whenever one of my friends tied a jacket around his or her waist, I slung mine over my forearm and wished I could do that. And yesterday, it took me a second before I realized I probably could now, and tried it. Such a small victory but it definitely made me smile and feel "normal".

In a cardiovascular sense, the 10K is not that tough. In a knee-and-lower-back pain sense, it's not. A visit to the chiropractor is in order before I do this for real. And even my knee braces didn't protect me from the need to ice them down this morning. The morning after...that's when the shit gets real, right? Yeah, I'm pretty sore this morning. Again with the drugs. But it's all good.

My best time

Greetings fellow....people!

On Sunday, I spent father's day in London, Ontario participating in Prostate Cancer Canada's Father's Day 5K Walk/Run. It rained the night before and the entire morning, but by the time we took off, it stopped. Later on, the sun came out and all was right with the world. Running the entire 5K would've been ideal but I'm just not there yet. Not like I've trained super hard to do it, either. I ran when I could, walked when I couldn't.

I raised $510 for the cause and I'm pleased with that. All told, over a million dollars got poured into the coffers from races all over the country. So that's awesome.

Coming into the finish, I got the shock of my life when the clock said just over 47 minutes. We got a late start and I wasn't really sure how long I'd been gone. That time is not great, I know. But in October at the CIBC Run for the Cure, the 5K took me just over an hour to complete. So this is real progress and I'm proud of that sucky time! Erich was waiting for me at the finish line. He said he checked out the clock said to himself "Oh, I have 15 or 20 minutes to wait for her," then all of the sudden I was jogging towards him! Very cool to surprise him like that and make him proud.

Some pics from the race (click to enlarge):

Ready for the rain (ditched the poncho soon after this was taken):



Finish line!



I know my face is blood red but honest to god, I felt like a million bucks. My face reddens very easily under normal circumstances. The picture gave my mom a fright, though. LOL!



Back at the hotel after the race, we had the guy behind the counter take our pic:



I ordered those shirts we have on from Zazzle. Much better to deal with than Cafe Press, I'm just sayin'. And no, they didn't pay me to say that. I'm thinking of putting in another order after I came across this shirt. Too lame? Probably. Meh.

Last night, beautious bariatric blogger Beth Badore (a.k.a. Melting Mama) FINALLY appeared on ABC doing what she does best - shooting straight. Beth went to NYC weeks ago to film an interview with Deborah Roberts that was supposed to appear on an hour-long 20/20 special on weight loss. Ended up on the cutting room floor. Well, they resurrected the piece for Nightline and its story on alcohol addiction and weight-loss surgery (WLS).

The thing is, those of us who have had WLS possess addictive personalities. The tendency for some is to replace one addiction for another when food is taken out of the equation. Drugs and alcohol are easy new soulmates due to the re-plumbing we had via the surgery...we feel the effects faster. We get drunk faster and we sober up faster. And, as Beth so eloquently put it, "If you can't swallow chicken, you can swallow wine." Poultry, for non-WLS readers, is a notoriously rough food for patients to get down. Some can never eat it again - I can (thank goodness). Check out the video HERE.