I had a rough weekend. I don't know WTF was wrong with me, but I took the celebrating to new extremes and ate some stuff I shouldn't - and I know better.
I guess the whole thing illustrates why I'm in this situation; it's hard to stay on the wagon, so to speak. I should've been feeling so great and so motivated after that dr. visit on Friday, but it's like in my head I was thinking 'I've met my goal, so party on!' Idiotic! Or maybe I felt like I was rewarding myself for reaching that goal? I dunno.
I wasn't doing too badly till Sunday when I went to McDonald's and got a quarter pounder, fries AND cinnamon melts. Huge mistake and lemme tell ya, lesson learned...I was physically ill for the rest of the day and up into the evening. OMG, I was sooo sick. Erich said I'd de-toxed my body the last couple of months then I put crap into it so it made me sick. That makes sense, I suppose. The fact was, it wasn't enjoyable. It was good going down, but even before I was done I was thinking 'Oh shit...what have I done?' I almost hurled from the nausea and the disappointment in myself.
There's a phenomenon after gastric bypass surgery called 'dumping'. Basically, if you eat too much sugar, simple carbs or JUNK, your body will reject it. You will get sick, really sick. I think I had my first dumping episode and I ain't even had the surgery yet!
It's not a mistake I'll make again anytime soon. I have to care about myself more than that, right? I mean seriously...WTF??
So on Monday I had to try and pick myself up and start over, one day at a time.
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I'm sorry Cindy. But you're back on the right track and that's what's important. Imagine if it was a good experience. Our bodies are smart. I gave up fast food after I found out I had breast cancer again. Well, like you one day I gave in. My disappointment is now I can no longer say I haven't eaten fast food in .....
ReplyDeleteHope you're feeling better now. Keep up the good work!
(((HUGS))) You're human. Welcome to the club. Good for you for starting again. You'll get there. I know you will!
ReplyDeleteBeen there and done that, I can't eat that crap anymore without getting really sick either, and I guess that's a good thing, because I don't WANT to eat it. I feel for you Cindy, I know it can be really rough, but you are doing really good! We all fall down once in a while, if we didn't we wouldn't be human. What's important is to learn from your mistake, pick yourself up and start over again. And most importantly, forgive yourself! You are doing an incredible job... just remember that. In the grand scheme of things, you are really rockin it!
ReplyDeleteI know you feel bad but Jeez girl - give yourself a break! You have done an awesome job in losing all that weight and you will keep doing an awesome job. This is just a teeny tiny blip.
ReplyDeleteI think you had to have this slip up so you could see that you haven't been missing anything. Next time you want a Big Mac you'll remember that awful feeling and choose something that will make you feel good instead.
One week is nothing. Shake it off!